The Sacredness of a Broken Heart
We all know it hurts to have your heart broken. And now they finally have the scientific data to back it up. Recent research from the University of California, Los Angeles, indicates that emotional pain may be more closely linked to physical pain than scientists previously realized. According to Naomi Eisenberger, lead author of the study, the distress from rejection registers in the same part of the brain that responds to physical pain, triggering similar sensations to, say, a broken arm. Which is just affirmation of what we've known all along: heartbreak hurts.
If you've had any prolonged exposure to other human beings, chances are pretty good that somewhere along the way you've had your heart broken. If not, hang on—you will soon enough. Maybe someone who promised to stick with you left with little warning. Maybe a close friend betrayed your trust or let you down when you needed her most. Or maybe you have that awful feeling in your gut that the person you love just doesn't love you back. When our hearts are broken, we limp along, wondering how we ended up here and if we'll ever make it to the other side of the pain. And perhaps worst of all, we feel utterly and helplessly alone.
But what I've been noticing lately in Scripture is that we aren't alone in this. God himself—powerful and holy as he is—knows what it is to have his heart broken. He isn't sitting up in the clouds somewhere, watching with detached interest as if we're some daytime TV show. He's fully engaged with us, pouring out his love on us and longing for us to love him back. When he made us, he could have created beings who were automatically loyal to him, who robotically returned his affection. But instead, he designed us with the will to decide how we'd respond to him, and in doing so, he opened his heart to profound love—and profound heartache.
So when we endure these heartbreaks ourselves—rejection, betrayal, abandonment—we don't walk through them alone. God has walked that road himself. And in some mysterious way, when our hearts are broken, we're given new insight into the very character of God.
The Sacredness of Being Rejected
The Old Testament is more than merely a historical narrative or a set of rules. Woven into the lining of each book, each story, is a common thread that reads more like a romance novel: God pursues his chosen people; they reject him and turn to less worthy loves; he keeps loving them anyway. Time after time, he does whatever it takes to win his loved ones back.
Ever since the beginning, we humans have been breaking God's heart. Adam and Eve had the unparalleled opportunity to walk in unbroken closeness with God, yet they rejected the relationship he offered in exchange for a hollow promise (Genesis 3). Since then, people have continued to turn our backs on God's love and faithfulness. Jeremiah recounts the way God aches over our rejection of his love: "They broke that covenant, though I loved them as a husband loves his wife" (Jeremiah 31:32). If anyone has felt the sting of rejection, it's God.
More from Stephanie Voiland:
Kyria.com | Books
Join the Kyria.com Community!
Become a member to have access to the following:
- Full access to hundreds of other articles for thoughtful, influential women
- The monthly Kyria digizine, each issue focusing on a spiritual discipline or theme
- 20 percent discount on all of the downloadable resources in the Kyria Store
downloadable guides
Prayer and Meditation
Cultivating a deeper relationship with God.Ministering to Working Women
How your women's ministry can better meet the needs of women who work outside the home.Browse More Guides





Average User Rating: Not rated
Displaying 15 of 9 comments.
See all comments
Penni Britt(Registered User)
I enjoyed the article. I am struggling after 2 failed marriages with loneliness. My last marriage lasted 4 years and he left because he decided he wanted a child with someone who would raise a conservative child and he said I didn't a raise my child, from a previous relationship. conservative. We are still friends,but I am lonely in the sense of having no male to do things with: movies, eating out and etc. I need a physical body to fulfill that need. My Dad died 17 years ago or he would help in that area. The article talks about God will fill the loneliness, we single people feel, but I don't think he can with my loneliness. I don't trust men, but would like to just have a good male friend to do stuff with. I am a very devoted Christian and have alot faith in God, but do struggle with this.
Jenna
It's been 2 years since my ex-husband blew me away with his decision to leave me for someone else. Heartbreak is nothing new to me. But thank you for reminding me that I am not alone in my emotional turmoil and that God does understand.
CARMEN
THANK YOU FOR THIS ARTICLE. JUST LAST NIGHT I FELT HOW POWERFUL AND HURTFUL IT FEELS TO BE REJECTED. I HAVE BEEN MARRIED 13 YEARS AND THIS IS WHERE I AM NOW. WHAT EVER IT TAKES FOR ME TO SEE GOD'S SHEKINA. I KNOW MY LORD IS TEACHING BEAUTIFUL THINGS THROUGH THIS CHAPTER OF MY LIFE. THANK YOU FOR THIS ARTICLE IT TOUCHED ME DEEPLY. I HAVE SHARED IT WITH OTHERS AS WELL. IN HIS PRESENCE, CARMEN
Anonymous
Bernadette I am pregnant with two children and separated from my husband of four years. I have an inner peace, I know it is from God. At this point my heart is numb, I can't feel anything, as I type this tears are filling my eyes. I know that God will use this situation to touch someone else, but oh boy! I love my husband very much, sometimes I feel as if I hate him. He broke my heart, I don't know if it will ever heal to the point where no one will notice that my heart was broken. Inspite of everything I know that God is a good God, He loves me and He promised to never leave me nor forsake me. This article really touched me.
Tatiana
Last year i experienced rejection from my husband whom i loved dearly. I remember feeling so confused initially. once the reality of the situation settled in I discovered how calm I was in the midst of it all. It took nine months to finalise the divorce but those months made me experience higher level of Gods love. I came to realise the true meaning of "peace that surpasses all understanding", because I have experienced it. Thanks for the article!
Rate & Comment on this article *