What You Say Before You Die
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My sister Marilyn was diagnosed with brain cancer when she was 46 and I was 43. The disease was in an advanced stage since her symptoms had been undetected—masked by another serious medical condition.
She lived with brain cancer as a valiant warrior who displayed a quiet and determined demeanor for the entire 10 months of its stranglehold. The ravages of the disease could have given her reason to complain. Things like hair loss, a sunken spot on her head where a skull bone was removed, and enormous weight gain due to medication. All this could have caused her to despair over her physical appearance. Then she endured an emergency hospitalization, dealing with unbearable pain on the exact date of her 47th birthday, Easter Sunday that year. This sudden devastation of staph infection in her skull bone could have caused loud protests of "why me?" Yet Marilyn remained calm with single-minded faith in Christ.
She told me her deepest desire was that good things would come from her tragedy. She wanted her friends and family, who voiced anguish and concern in cards they wrote, to see this accomplished. Maybe not now. Maybe later. When she heard that a person reexamined his life and eternal destiny because of her sudden serious diagnosis, she rejoiced.
Marilyn spent tedious hours writing lists of ways she could help her loved ones; her physical abilities were limited, but not her desire to serve God. She called in orders for inspirational books to give away. She sent cards of encouragement and thanks, filled with sincere words of love. She spent what little energy she had making sure she kept focused on others.
Many people prayed for Marilyn. And on the days of pain and horror, when her deep roots of faith in God were tested, they held firm. Prayer surrounded her.
During her nearly year-long bout with brain cancer, I received an inestimable gift. Time. I was privileged to be Marilyn's daytime caregiver every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. Multiplied hours of time, more valuable than jewels or any earthly treasure. Hours of firsthand witness. But the most powerful gift was the last conversation I had with her before she died.
If you could plan the last conversation of your life, no doubt you'd begin now. You might use dictionaries, commentaries, Bibles, and possibly a stack of Erma Bombeck's complete works. Eventually you could write an impressive monologue.
My sister Marilyn didn't have the heads-up to plan hers with me. Yet it couldn't have been more excellently scripted even if she'd been warned.
Future Glory
As I spent caregiving hours with her, I saw Marilyn ingest the Word. It nourished when nothing else could. I saw that faith works. In the battle between disease and healing, I saw that she used her armor well (Ephesians 6:10-18) and left the outcome to her God and Savior.
Related Topics:
Afterlife, Attitude, Belief, Death, Kindness, Serving
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Debbie
Thank you for sharing your story. So often we forget that this life is but a vapor and we harbor grudges and unforgiveness. We must love and cherish our family.
Susan Turner
Thank you for sharing your heart warming story. It brought back memories of when I went to see my Mother in the hospital, dying of cancer too. It was Mother's Day and I was feeding her lunch, talking. Nothing special or out of the ordinary for our conversation. When it was time to leave I kissed her on the forehead and said, "Happy Mother's Day Momma, I Love You and thank you for being the most wonderful Mother a daughter could ever have." Then, before my Dad passed away I talked to him on the phone and couldn't come see him for Christmas that year. (first time ever) At the end of the conversation we said our goodbyes, "I love You Daddy" and he said, "I love you more Princess." Anyway, your story made me stop and praise God that the last words between both my parents and me were I love you. Not very many people can say that~I still miss them, but instead of mourning them, I think of all I learned from them and thank the Lord for His gift of them to be MY parents. Blessings, Susan
Aya
Thank's for sharing such touching story. Now I researching the death theme and last words and so on. Unfortunately not always people have time to say last words to loved one. And I don't want my last words say in angry or stimulation. I want say something kind and important - how much I love them and how thakful I am for there presence in my life.
Kathleen Welty
Juanita - I am grateful you commented and that Marilyn's story inspired you. It was always her greatest desire that something bad like brain cancer could be turned in to something good. You have shown it is possible. Thanks. Kathleen
Juanita
What an inspirational story. On, to be like Jesus in the last days and hours of our lives. Lord, help me not to wait...please help me to be more like you every day!
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