Balancing Act
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When people hear I work part-time out of my home as a corporate management consultant and writer, and still am available to my two children, they usually say, "You're so lucky. You have the best of both worlds." But luck had little to do with it; it took careful planning years in advance.
Your situation may differ from mine, but no matter what approach you choose, preplanning's essential to ensure the outcome you want to achieve. For example, if you desire to be a stay-at-home mom, consider the following tips before you're faced with the challenge of balancing financial needs with the needs of your children:
1 Define what it means to stay at home. My children attended day care/preschool 12-15 hours a week from 3 months of age, but I considered myself a stay-at-home mother. Other "full-time" moms I know run their home business after their children go to bed, juggle schedules with their husband, or split their part-time hours between their home and an office. And some fit the traditional picture of a homemaker. What would be ideal for you?
2 Decide what you value as a couple. Our first child was born while my husband was employed by a company in financial trouble. Since his position was shaky, he felt I needed to work enough to at least stay networked in my career. That meant someone else watched our children 12 hours a week—a small compromise for peace of mind.
Some husbands are uncomfortable with the thought of being the sole breadwinner. Discuss these values and priorities with your spouse now.
3 Pick a career that honors parenthood. After becoming a mother, an attorney friend of mine was told by her male partners, "If we as fathers have to put in 60-hour weeks, so do you."
In contrast, one corporate trainer was allowed to pick her schedule and clients, working just a few hours a week after her child was born. Talk to people in different careers and companies to discover which will allow you either to put your career on hold or put your children first.
4 Be flexible. After my children were born, I was able to work as a consultant because of the advanced degree I'd obtained in night school. While attending classes on top of a 40-hour work week was tough, I sought the degree in hopes of gaining the type of flexibility I now have. If you hope to work part-time, consider if specialized training could increase your chances. Few moms have time for school once children arrive.
5 Live on one income. Children bring increased expenses, making it difficult to cut back on your lifestyle after they've arrived. Start now by living on one income and saving the earnings of the other spouse. My husband and I made this rule when we first married, and we can testify it isn't impossible if you keep this goal in mind as you buy your home, a car, or plan a vacation. Just remember what's important to you: keeping your family a priority.
Originally published in: Today's Christian Woman, 2001, July/August, Vol. 23, Issue 4, Page 38
Related Topics:
Balance, Career, Children, Finances, parenting, Planning, priorities, Values, Work
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