Sex as Sacred
Average Rating:
[9 Comments]
Television host Bill Maher, known for his political commentary, in 2001 discussed some "rules for relationships" on his show Politically Incorrect. With three women guests on the panel, he said, "Don't [gripe] about porn."
When they asked what he meant, he responded, "Unless you [women] are willing to give us sex whenever we want, you don't have the right to gripe if we use pornography."
After hearing his explanation, all three women readily agreed that the rule made sense. Surprised? Most aren't. Maher's rule and the response from these women simply demonstrate the prevalent view our contemporary society holds about men and sex. That is, the purpose of sex for men is primarily personal pleasure and we won't be denied it.
Of course this attitude didn't start with Bill Maher. He was simply drinking the Kool-Aid of an unknown copywriter in Chicago who stirred up the belief decades earlier when he started a magazine called Playboy. Pasted up on a card table in his apartment, the first issue featured a centerfold of Marilyn Monroe reclining nude on a carpet of red satin. Of course, that man was Hugh Hefner. And he was not only selling a magazine—he was selling sex. More specifically, he was selling a new sexual ethic. He was doing nothing less than starting a revolution by asking 1950s America to trade in its "sexual repression" for what he called "a liberated lifestyle."
In the postwar era of the 1950s, skin magazines and smut films were only available to those who knew where to find them, typically at back-alley newsstands or seedy adult theaters. Hefner wanted to change all that. But how do you take such an upheaval of hedonistic values mainstream? The key for Hefner was to create an upscale image for Playboy and carefully edge it toward the middle. As Brian Murra says, "he combined Esquire's literary sophistication with the sort of artful nudes one could find in camera magazines like Popular Photography." ("Bare Nekkid Ladies: Hugh Hefner and the Mainstreaming of Pornography," The Weekly Standard, August 2, 2004).
Unlike other men's magazines of the day, Playboy didn't run crime stories or articles about fishing. From the start, it emphasized being stylish, in-the-know, and cool. "We enjoy mixing up cocktails," he wrote in the first issue, "putting a little mood music on the phonograph, and inviting in a female acquaintance for a quiet discussion on Picasso, Nietzsche, jazz, sex."
Nothing too overt, just subtle and sophisticated.
Hip Like Hef
In 1959, Hefner began a syndicated television program to show men what the bachelor pad lifestyle could be like. Every week, a party was in progress, and Hefner, wearing a tux, invited viewers inside to meet his pals and mingle with "the girls."
Innocent and harmless, right? That was his idea. So was he really on a crusade to rewrite the system of sexual ethics for our day? Absolutely. He made that abundantly clear. His strategy was to remove the shame from self-centered sex by linking the pornographic lifestyle to cultural respect, big money, and political power. His goal was to free men from self-restraint and eliminate what he called "the evils of sexual inhibition."
Related Topics:
Marriage, Pornography, sex
More from Les Parrot:
Kyria.com | Books
Join the Kyria.com Community!
Become a member to have access to the following:
- Full access to the bimonthly Kyria digizine, each issue focusing on a spiritual discipline or theme
- 50 percent discount on all of the downloadable resources in the Kyria Store
- Hundreds of members-only articles for thoughtful, influential women
downloadable guides
Sabbath Rest in a World of Stress
Practical insights for how to live a life that honors the spirit of Sabbath-rest.The Mentoring Series: Nancy Ortberg
Discover leadership principles from a well-known author and respected leader.Browse More Guides


Average User Rating:
Displaying 15 of 9 comments
See all comments
Greg Williams
Excellent article from a highly respected source, Les Parrot! Thanks for Truth regarding God and sexuality! If you really want to further understand the perversion and 'destruction' of sex and the connections that have brought us to where we are, check out this quote, supposedly attributed to Hugh Hefner, "The reason I've been so successful in this business (sex/porn) is because the Church has done such a horrible job with regard to sexuality!" Now here's the tracing of the legitimizing, promotion, glorifying and most destructively, normalizing of sex - 'Dr' Alfred Kinsey's goal in his 'junk science' research on human sexuality was simply 'sex without any boundaries'! When the Ford and Rockefeller Foundations decided to bow out of funding (1938 - 1964) of the Kinsey Institute at Indiana Univ. guess who brilliantly (not wisely as there is clearly no fear of God) decided to fund it? You guessed it-Hugh Hefner! Why not! Porn becomes Education! Thanks again and God bless in Christ! Greg
C. Lee Butterbean
'Sacred', in many circles, can also mean 'rare', and 'infrequent', 'only for special occasions'. Every day is a special occasion...
Troo 2 U
Good comment from Lee. Marriage and sex is fleshly, carnal, delightful. It is God's bribe, if you will, or His clever trick to get us to marry, despite all odds. If we were perfect, Sex soothes a marriage and motivates keeping good behavior. It is not shameful to enjoy the carnal craving if married. It is a drug, the ultimate high, permitted by God and called Good. But I beg Kyria in the future to discuss more seriously what goes on in our heads while mates enjoy each other. We have to confess to really get to the problem and solution. Men are visual. Stop denying it. Stop fearing it. we are as God made us. Stop calling God evil by calling His creation evil. More needs to be said.
Lee
Sexual intimacy is not spiritual and does not make anyone closer to God. The author is confusing emotion with spirituality. Neither does it make one holy. One is made holy by the regeneration of the Holy Spirit both body and soul and sexual intimacy within the design of God keeps one holy. However, the violation of sexual intimacy (fornication)destroys that holiness bodily and spiritually, because of it being idolatry. It defiles what was made holy to where it can be holy no more. This article is just another attempt of many to try and make sexual intimacy into something more than what it is. Sexual intimacy makes either a true marriage between two people or a fornicated marriage between two people.
Mark
The notion that Victorians were sexually repressed has now been largely dismissed and that they covered furniture legs to avoid impure thoughts is an urban myth. Yes they strongly believed in no sex outside of marriage but many historians now acknowledge that within marriage they were quite adventurous and had a healthy interest in sex. I expect these myths were started by those who rejected the notion of sex being restricted to marriage. Other than that, I found the article very reasonable and insightful. Thanks.
Rate & Comment on this article *