Say it with Leather

The real truth about anniversary gifts

Conrad Theodore

Average Rating: Not rated

[0 Comment]

There are no previous pages

1 of 2

Where has the romance gone? Remember all those cute little things you used to do when you first started going out? You know, the stuff that made each of you feel like floating on air while simultaneously making your friends sick?

You may have thought it was a secret, but we all knew about those cute little notes and gifts you'd give each other on the anniversary of every month or week of your first date. We saw the stuffed animals sitting on your dashboard, the personalized poems penned in your notebook. We even heard you recite them—in baby talk, no less—when you thought we weren't paying attention. They went something like:

Remember when we first started dating?
You've grown in so many ways.
There's nothing about you that I'm hating.
I love these past ten days.
xoxo4ever

So what happened, Cupcake? First came love, then came marriage. But perhaps with the exception of bringing home a baby carriage, the fountain of spontaneous gifts dramatically slowed to the trickle of an occasional greeting card. Store-bought, not homemade.

Okay, I'll admit it. This is the story of my life. It's not that we've fallen out of love. I guess you can say we've gotten comfortable with one another.

No, I'm not cheap. And apparently, I'm not alone on this, since many couples seem to slack off a little more in the gift department with each passing year of marriage.

It all starts on your wedding day. You've heard of couples buying each other keepsake wedding gifts like pearl earrings and engraved watches—at least they did around the turn of the last century. But between selecting the cake frosting and getting that Top Ten request list ready for the band, who has time to shop? And you don't want to see each other before the ceremony—it's bad luck. So instead you send a note and some flowers letting your soon-to-be lifetime partner know how special this date is always going to be to you. You really meant to do that.

Then a year later, your surprise trip to the Bahamas has to be exchanged for an overnight at a Holidome thirty miles from home. You opted for that big screen television a few months back, and at the moment, you're a little cash shy. Don't worry, you can make it up next year, right?

You really mean that. But as the second anniversary date rolls around, you figure your marriage survived without the major trip. And you convince yourself that Number Two isn't really a milestone year anyway. Besides, the Packers are playing the Bears. Who wouldn't love two tickets to that?

Apparently, she doesn't.

Nor does she particularly care for the leather miniskirt I give her for our third anniversary. Now I'm not totally to blame for that one. You see I was standing in line at the grocery story on the day before our anniversary, wondering what to get her, when the bagger asked, "Paper or plastic?" That's it! If something made of paper is the traditional gift for the first year, I wonder what's on tap for Year Three? It turns out it's leather. She'll see I still think she's sexy after three long years. Instead, she thinks I'm trying to make her my trophy wife. I sleep on the den sofa that night—it's the one covered in leather.

next page... |

There are no previous pages

1 of 2

Originally published in: Marriage Partnership, 2000, Winter

More from Conrad Theodore:
Kyria.com | Books

Join the Kyria.com Community!

Become a member to have access to the following:

Full access to the bimonthly Kyria digizine, each issue focusing on a spiritual discipline or theme
50 percent discount on all of the downloadable resources in the Kyria Store
Hundreds of members-only articles for thoughtful, influential women