Anti-Climax
Average Rating: Not rated
[0 Comment]What's wrong with me? Gail thought. Why won't my body do what I want it to?
When Gail came to see me, with some embarrassment she confessed, "I have trouble having an orgasm."
She said her husband was also frustrated because he wanted her to enjoy sex as much as he did. Neither of them knew what was wrong. His feelings of frustration and inadequacy only made Gail feel more pressure to perform and less able to do so.
Gail suffers from Female Orgasmic Disorder (FOD), a persistent or recurrent delay in, or absence of, orgasm, following normal sexual excitement. The Hite Report, a nationwide study of female sexuality, reported recently that 79 percent of women have, at some time, suffered from FOD. In my practice as a psychotherapist and sex therapist, I frequently hear this complaint.
Many women don't realize that orgasm is an inborn capacity; it's God-designed. Just as orgasm is natural for men, it's also natural for women. It's an instinctive, God-given response he wants married women to experience.
Yet "blockages" can occur that hinder a woman's sexual experience with her husband. Orgasm involves the mind and the body, so "blockages" can be physical or psychological.
Physical blockages
Perimenopause or low testosterone. If you think testosterone is found only in men, guess what? Testosterone gives women sexual desire and orgasmic ability as well.
When clients come to me with FOD, the first thing I do is rule out the possibility of physical problems by asking them to get a full gynecological checkup. Gail, 35, reported that she'd been having intermittent periods and that her mother had had an early menopause. Indeed, Gail's gynecologist found she was perimenopausal, within three or four years of full menopause, and had low testosterone.
Originally published in: Marriage Partnership, 2003, Winter
More from Shay Roop:
Kyria.com | Books
Join the Kyria.com Community!
Become a member to have access to the following:
- Full access to the bimonthly Kyria digizine, each issue focusing on a spiritual discipline or theme
- 50 percent discount on all of the downloadable resources in the Kyria Store
- Hundreds of members-only articles for thoughtful, influential women
downloadable guides
Sabbath Rest in a World of Stress
Practical insights for how to live a life that honors the spirit of Sabbath-rest.
The Mentoring Series: Nancy Ortberg
Discover leadership principles from a well-known author and respected leader.Browse More Guides
back to top
Average User Rating: Not rated
Rate & Comment on this article *