Become Pen Pals
Average Rating: Not rated
[0 Comment]Dear Bill,
Just want to let you know I'm thinking of you and praying for you this week. I know things are difficult at work right now with all the changes, but just know that the kids and I appreciate all you do. I'm praying specifically that you will have peace and that the Lord will work out the details whether it be finding another job or finding contentment where you are now. Easier said than done, I know. But somehow this is all part of God's plan even though we don't see how right now. Whatever decision you make concerning the situation, I am behind you. And don't forget—I love you!
—Sara
Sara,
Thanks for praying for me. Some days it's really hard to go to work and deal with all that's happening. It's scary to not know what the future holds and whether or not I'll have a job this time next year. I appreciate that you are praying for me. It is hard to have peace and contentment right now, but until the Lord shows me otherwise, there aren't many other options. I know things haven't been easy for you either. Thanks for standing by me in spite of everything. You don't know how much it means to me to know that you and the kids are there when I get home each day.
—Bill
Where e-mails of encouragement or letters of love may be staples of doe-eyed courting couples, when you think of married people expressing love, rarely does using the written word come to mind. While mailing letters or sending e-mails to someone sleeping in the same bed may seem strange, writing entries to each other in a journal can help a couple create a source of understanding and intimacy when face-to-face communication may not express what you want to say.
Mutual journaling is simply another form of letter writing, but instead uses one journal (a notebook or blank book) in which a couple can write and respond to each other. It shouldn't replace physical and verbal communication, but it can serve as a safe way to express what one is feeling without being misunderstood, interrupted, or becoming defensive. Or for the partner who is uneasy saying so verbally, it can become a more comfortable way to express encouragement and love. This type of writing can serve as a springboard to discussion, especially of difficult or potentially argumentative topics.
Ways to Use It
How a couple uses written communication is a matter of what they hope to gain from the experience. For some, the journal may serve as a book of love letters to each other, while others may prefer to share what God is doing in their lives. It can become a shared devotional and prayer notebook. Writing out a prayer for a spouse can do wonders in giving them hope during a difficult time. Difficult subjects such as aging parents, in-laws, and finances can also find diplomatic ground in a journal.
For Eric and Brandy, writing was an important form of communication early in their relationship while he was at college and she was still in high school. "Neither of us had enough money for phone bills, so we wrote — sometimes every day," says Brandy. "Now that we are married, we still communicate through writing. And the best thing about co-journaling is that children don't overhear heated discussions and we can work out things when we aren't so tired at the end of the day."
Originally published in: Marriage Partnership, 2002, Summer
More from Cindy Baum:
Kyria.com | Books
Join the Kyria.com Community!
Become a member to have access to the following:
- Full access to the bimonthly Kyria digizine, each issue focusing on a spiritual discipline or theme
- 50 percent discount on all of the downloadable resources in the Kyria Store
- Hundreds of members-only articles for thoughtful, influential women
downloadable guides
Sabbath Rest in a World of Stress
Practical insights for how to live a life that honors the spirit of Sabbath-rest.
The Mentoring Series: Nancy Ortberg
Discover leadership principles from a well-known author and respected leader.Browse More Guides
back to top
Average User Rating: Not rated
Rate & Comment on this article *